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How to repeat so as not to forget anything. Patterns of memorization and repetition Repeat material

Are you familiar with the following situation?

You have learned new material. Everything seemed simple and clear to you. But after a while you find it difficult to remember the rule, you start to get confused, and you have to figure it out again. Because of this, your learning moves slowly.

How to avoid it?

Repetition plays a very important role in teaching English. After all, it is repetition that allows you to consolidate the material and remember it for a long time.

In this article, I will give you 6 tips on how not to lose what you have learned. This will allow you to master the language faster.

First, let's take a closer look at why repetition is needed.

Why repeat material when learning English?


Why is it so important to repeat what you have learned when learning a language?

There are 2 good reasons for this:

1. By repeating the material, you immediately identify all the misunderstood points

Sometimes the material is difficult to understand the first time. Therefore, it happens that it seems to you that you completely understood the rule. But then you still get confused about how to use it.

This means that there are some misunderstood moments in the material. And if you don’t deal with them, then very soon you will forget everything that you have gone through.

By repeating the material, you will immediately find out what you did not understand enough, and you can analyze it again.

2. By repeating the material, you train its use and remember it.

For example, why can we easily and quickly build one sentence, but we need to think very long before using another construction?

Simply because we can easily use the material that we repeated and spoke more than once in our own speech.

Let's look at an example.

Answer the question right now:

You will automatically answer this question:

I am from…Russia/Moscow.
I'm from… Russia/Moscow.

Why don't you think about this answer?

You've heard this question a million times and answered it just as many times. That is, you have already repeated it a lot of times. Therefore, your response was quick and confident.

By repeating the material correctly and regularly, you can achieve this with all English constructions.

So how do you effectively repeat material?

Tip #1: Reinforce what you've learned in writing

After passing the material, be sure to fix its use the next day. This is best done in writing.

If you have studied the rule, then make sentences using it. If you studied words, then make sentences with these words.

It is best if you have a person (for example, your teacher) who will check your work and correct errors.

Important: If you are not doing your homework (reinforcing the material), then you are wasting your time. You can't learn English without doing it.

After all, it is homework that allows you to consolidate the material and identify points that you do not understand.

Tip #2: Review new material in the next class

Start a new session by reviewing the material you learned last time.

There is no need to repeat the rules again. Of course, if your written work did not reveal any gaps and misunderstandings.

The best way is to repeat the material using it. To do this, you can compose a short story or dialogue.

For example, in the last lesson, you went through the Present Simple tense (the real simple) and the list of words "House Duties".

Talk about what you usually do around the house and what other family members help with. What household chores do you like and what don't. How often do you do things around the house. Use as many new words and constructions as possible.

Such a story will not take more than 15 minutes, but on the other hand, you will not only repeat the material, but also learn how to tell about your life with it.

Tip #3: Set up separate days for repetition


New material is difficult to remember the first time. Therefore, be sure to arrange repetition days. For example, once a week review the material that has been covered during this time.

As in the previous paragraph, try to repeat the material using it in speech.

If you feel that at the same time it is difficult for you to use some rule, then be sure to mark this construction, and then analyze it again.

Important: If, when revisiting this rule, you feel that you are confused and it is still difficult for you to use it, then go back a step.

So the gaps are in the rule that you studied before.

For example, if you can't make a special question with the words (what, where, who, when, how), then go back to regular questions.

Tip #4: Exercise Regularly, Don't Take Long Breaks

The more often you study, the easier it will be for you to remember the material covered. If you study twice a week, you will have to spend a significant part of the next session on repetition, as you will forget the material.

It is best to study every day: take apart new material, fix it the next day. Then you can move much faster.

Important: Do not take long breaks in class. This is especially critical for people who have just started learning the language.

Imagine that after a month of training, you decide to take a break, for example, for 4-6 weeks.

As a result, you will have to start learning the language almost from scratch, because after such a break you won’t even remember much of the material you have covered. So the time and effort spent will be in vain.

So you can constantly practice and repeat the material. For example, while driving to work, mentally describe the people next to you: how they look, what they are wearing, what they are doing. Describe the streets you walk on. In doing so, use the material that you have recently studied.

Tip #6: Fit English into your everyday life

You do not need to allocate separate time to review material. You can do this in between activities. For example, while driving to work, cooking, shopping, etc.

And if you get into the habit of doing in English what you did in Russian, then you won’t have to look for time for separate language classes at all.

For instance:

  • Look for information in English in a search engine
  • Watch movies and series in English
  • Read articles and books in English
  • Watch and read news in English

This way you will practice and revise your English without wasting time.

Outcome

So, repetition of material is an integral part of learning. At the same time, it is very important to repeat the topics covered correctly and on time.

To effectively repeat material, you need to:

1. To fix the worked out material in writing (in the form of homework)

2. Take 10-15 minutes in the next class to use what you have learned

3. Arrange separate days for repetition

4. Exercise regularly, do not take long breaks

5. Train yourself to think in English

6. Fit English into your life and use it

These tips will help you to properly consolidate the material, and you can easily and quickly use it in your life.

Until I finished reading the paragraph, half flew out of my head ... Familiar? Almost all pupils and students face this problem. The fact is that the human brain is not programmed for cramming, and it generally perceives most of what is written in the textbook as noise - useless information that should not be stored in memory. But if you know how these mechanisms work, you can learn to control this process and understand how to remember what you read the first time.

Science of memory

Before any information gets to our "hard drive", it goes through a complex path and undergoes multi-level processing. The first to study and describe these mechanisms was a German scientist. He identified 4 main processes of preservation, reproduction and forgetting.

What is the best way to remember what you read? In this case, the first two stages are of key importance. Therefore, they are worth considering in more detail.

memorization- this is an involuntary imprint of what affected the senses. At the same time, a trace of excitation caused by electrical impulses remains in the cerebral cortex for some time. In simple terms, everything we see, hear and feel leaves physical traces in our brain.

This can happen in different ways. Even in early childhood, the child activates the process of involuntary memorization. We all keep moments and facts that we didn't try to remember: a walk in the park at the age of 5, a first date, frames from our favorite movie... An interesting phenomenon is that we don't remember everything equally well. Why is this happening?

It all depends on the strength of electrical impulses, so we remember only certain types of information best of all:

  • something that is of vital importance (pain when you bring your hand to the fire);
  • unusual, vivid events and images (a bright costume of an actor at a carnival);
  • information that is related to our interests and needs (recipe for a delicious dish);
  • valuable knowledge necessary for our activities and the achievement of goals (correct test answers).

At 90%, how well some information is fixed in memory depends on our perception. First of all, what causes strong emotions (both positive and negative) or interest is imprinted.

Then there is intentional memorization, which is the process by which we deliberately try to "write down" certain information, such as dates from a history book or an important phone number.

Preservation is the process of processing, transforming and fixing new information in certain parts of the brain.

First, all information falls into a kind of "buffer", random access memory. Here the material is stored for a short time in its original form. But at the next stage, the information is processed, associated with the already known, simplified and transferred to long-term memory. The most difficult thing is to prevent distortions, to prevent the brain from adding non-existent facts or "throw out" key points. Knowing all this, it is much easier to understand how to remember what you read the first time.

We set clear goals

Even if you read very carefully and thoughtfully, turning the page, you can hardly retell in detail what you just learned.

Back in the 19th century, the Yugoslav psychologist P. Radossavlevich conducted an interesting experiment. The task that confronted the subject was to memorize meaningless syllables. This usually required several repetitions. Then the goal changed - now it was just necessary to read what was written. The subject did this as many as 46 (!) times, but when the experimenter asked to repeat the series by heart, he could not do it. But as soon as I realized that they needed to be learned, it took only 6 times to glance over the syllables in order to accurately retell them. What does it say?

There are some tricks here too. The main goal should be broken down into more specialized tasks. Simply put, you choose what to focus on. In one case, it is enough to highlight the main facts, in another - their sequence, and in the third - to memorize the text verbatim. Then the brain, while reading, will begin to create "hooks" that will help memorize the necessary information.

We create a comfortable environment

And we continue to discuss how to remember the text you read the first time. First of all, it is worth looking around in search of "irritants". In a noisy classroom or public transport, attention is scattered, and sometimes you are not even aware of what is written in the textbook.

In order to fully immerse yourself in the process, it is advisable to sit in a quiet room or find a secluded place somewhere in nature - where nothing will distract you.

It is advisable to study in the morning, when the head is still as clean as possible and new information is absorbed much faster.

Discussing with friends

Although many people do not like retelling in school literature lessons, this is one of the most effective ways to better remember what you read. When you say what you recently read about, the brain activates two channels of memorization and reproduction at once - visual and auditory (auditory).

Learning to read correctly

If you want to know how to learn to remember what you read the first time, you should first of all work on your reading technique. Do not forget that visual memory plays a huge role in memorization: you mentally “photograph” a page, and if you can’t remember something, you just need to imagine it, and the necessary information will pop up in your head. But how can this be achieved?

  1. Do not immediately start to read every word, but try to cover the entire page with your eyes.
  2. Increase your reading speed. It has been proven that the faster a person studies a text, the more effectively information is absorbed. Try to expand the focus area in order to "grab" not one, but at least 2-3 words with your eyes. In addition, you can sign up for speed reading courses, where you will be taught
  3. When you notice that you have been distracted and missed a fragment, in no case do not return to it to reread it. Such "jumps" interfere with the holistic perception of the material. It is better to study the paragraph to the end, and then re-read it completely.
  4. Unlearn the habit of mentally pronouncing sentences or moving your lips. Because of these childhood habits, the brain cannot focus on the text, but spends some resources on supporting your "internal speaker".

In the first 3-4 hours it will be unusual and difficult. But as soon as you readjust, not only the speed of reading will increase, but also the amount of information that you will remember from the first time.

We write abstracts

Another option is how to remember what you read the first time. If you don’t just skim through the text, but work through the material and at least briefly write down the main points, later on these notes you can easily restore the necessary information in your memory.

However, it is important to know what and how to take notes, because without a certain system, you will simply get confused in a bunch of fragmentary facts. Here are a few techniques you can use:

  • grouping. All material is divided into small fragments, which are then combined according to some criteria (subject, time period, associations, etc.).
  • Plan. For each part of the text (paragraph, chapter or paragraph section), short notes are created that act as anchor points and help restore the full content. The format can be anything: key theses, titles, examples or questions to the text.
  • Classification. It is presented in the form of a diagram or a table. Allows you to distribute various objects, phenomena or concepts into groups and classes based on common features.
  • Schematization. With the help of text blocks, arrows and simple drawings, connections between various objects, processes and events are demonstrated.
  • Associations. Each point of the plan or thesis is correlated with a familiar, understandable or simply memorable way, which helps to "resurrect" the rest in memory.

At the same time, try not to get carried away. Remember that this is not a complete summary, but small pointers that will direct your thoughts in the right direction.

5 Best Active Memory Techniques

And now let's move on to the most "delicious" and talk about how to remember what you read the first time, even without preparation. Perhaps you have already come across the concept of mnemonics - these are various techniques that allow you to assimilate a large amount of information in a short time.

1. Visualization

When reading, you should imagine as vividly as possible all the events and phenomena described in the text. The more "alive" and emotional the pictures are, the better.

2. Creative associations

Few people know, but inventing them is a whole art. There are 5 "golden" rules that you need to follow in order to easily remember any information:

  • Don't think. Use the first image that comes to mind.
  • Associations must have a strong emotional component.
  • Imagine yourself as the main character (for example, if a lemon was lying on the table, try to "eat" it).
  • Add absurdity.
  • Make the resulting "picture" funny.

How it works? Let's say you're studying art and want to remember what pointillism is. In short: this is one of the varieties of neo-impressionism, where the paintings consist of many bright dots of the correct form (the founder is Georges-Pierre Seurat). What association can you come up with here? Imagine a ballerina who smeared her pointe shoes in paint and, circling in the dance, leaves a picture of multi-colored dots on the stage. He moves on and accidentally touches a jar of yellow sulfur with his foot, which falls with a loud crash. Here are our associations: pointe shoes with bright spots - pointillism, and a container with sulfur - Georges-Pierre Seurat.

3. Method of repetition by I. A. Korsakov

This technique is based on the fact that we forget a huge part of the information almost instantly. However, if you repeat the material regularly, it will be firmly fixed in your memory. What should be remembered?

  1. New information must be repeated within 20 seconds after its perception (if we are talking about a large piece of text - up to a minute).
  2. During the first day, retell the material several times: after 15-20 minutes, then after 8-9 hours, and finally after 24 hours.
  3. To remember what you read for a long time, you need to repeat the text several more times during the week - on the 4th and 7th days.

The technique is very simple, but at the same time incredibly effective. Regular repetitions let the brain know that this is not just informational noise, but important data that is constantly being used.

4. Cicero's method

A useful technique for those who want to know how to remember information read in books. The point is pretty simple. You choose a certain "base" - for example, the furnishings of your apartment. Remember how your morning begins, what and in what sequence you do. After that, you need to "attach" some piece of text to each action - again, with the help of associations. So you remember not only the essence, but also the sequence of presentation of information.

For example, while studying a paragraph on history, you can mentally "draw" scenes of battles on the bedside table or "send" Columbus to surf the bathroom.

5. Pictogram method

Have a blank sheet of paper and a pen ready. Immediately in the process of reading, you need to mentally mark key words and points. Your task is to come up with a small pictogram for each that will remind you of what was discussed. You do not need to make sketchy or, conversely, too detailed pictures, otherwise you will not be able to focus on the text and remember it normally. When you reach the end of a paragraph or chapter, try looking only at the pictograms to retell the text you just read.

Ekaterina Dodonova

Business coach, blogger, memory and speed reading instructor. Founder of the educational project iq230

1. Understand

Very often people try to memorize unfamiliar words and phrases without even understanding their meaning. Perhaps this is enough for a few days, say, to pass an exam. Unless, of course, the lecturer asks to explain what you mean by ablation and what are the signs of those same chromosomal aberrations from the first ticket.

The brain perfectly remembers words connected associatively. He discards incomprehensible letter combinations like garbage, not wanting to waste time on them.

For this reason, most people have difficulty learning. A strange-sounding word does not evoke native and understandable pictures to the heart.

Therefore, for better memorization, you must first parse and understand all new terms. Try to feel the word and associate it in your imagination with familiar concepts.

2. Come up with an association

The presence of fantasy is one of the most powerful tools for remembering information. Mnemonics greatly facilitate the process of memorizing important reports, presentations, texts, including in foreign languages, due to artificial associations.

Take the word "Monday". What frames are running on your internal screen? It could be the morning, terrible traffic jams, a thought pulsing in my head, a day on the calendar, a page in my childhood diary, or a buzzing office anthill. What do you see?

To make associative connections strong and durable, you can use the five-finger rule. Each finger has its own association, filled with one or another content.

Fingers Association
Big "Raisin". Original, absurd, absurd
Pointing "Emotions". Use only positive
Average "About yourself beloved." Feel free to associate the object of memorization with yourself
Nameless "Feel". Connect the senses: sight, hearing, smell, taste, tactile sensations
Little finger "In move". Make your subject move. The brain remembers information faster in dynamics

Thus, the necessary information will be imprinted in your memory at once at all levels of feelings, which will allow you to use it for a long time.

3. Fool the magic number 7 ± 2

The famous American psychologist George Miller found that short-term human memory cannot remember and repeat more than 7 ± 2 elements. The mode of constant information overload reduces this number to 5 ± 2.

Nevertheless, there is a simple way to deceive the laws of short-term memory: the use of the method of stories, which involves the logical linking of disparate memory objects into one chain. You can have a funny, incredible and completely impossible story in real life. The main thing is that with it you can remember more than 15 elements at a time.

As conceived by the director in the next scene, you should swim in a pool filled to the brim with semolina. Yes, just imagine this madness in bright colors. Feel with your skin how semolina sticks to your skin. How hard it is to swim in this warm liquid, although the porridge is not too thick. As in the air it smells of milk, butter and childhood.

4. Repeat correctly

Our brain can be programmed - it's a scientific fact. It requires awareness and daily work in the chosen direction. Therefore, if you have firmly decided that it is extremely important for you to learn English in six months, then the brain has already tuned in to intensive memorization. But in addition to regular training, regular repetition of the material covered is also important.

Use certain time intervals for the best memorization: repeat the material immediately after learning, then after 15-20 minutes, after 6-8 hours (preferably before bedtime) and the last time after a week.

5. Tune in

Perhaps there is nothing worse when a person thinks about himself in negative terms: “I will never cope with this”, “It is impossible for me to remember this”, “I will not be able to learn such a difficult report”. Use only positive affirmations when programming your brain for work and results.

Tune in correctly, tell yourself: “I remember!”, “I have a good memory. I will remember”, “I will remember and easily retell in my own words in two hours”. Customize yourself. The resource state of the brain is your area of ​​responsibility.

Knowing the five secrets of memory, you can easily learn to memorize really complex and versatile materials. In addition, there are many interesting and natural ways for a person to train memory and consolidate the necessary memory objects, which Ekaterina Dodonova also talks about in detail in her book.

Happy reading and have a great memory!

3 simple secrets and a little perseverance will help you remember any kind of information for a long time. The only thing is that you need to repeat what you have learned by heart in the right way. Mnemonist Yegor Dubrovin talks about a method that works flawlessly for him.

When teaching people how to quickly memorize, I often hear something like this: “How long will the information just memorized last in my memory?”. In this article, I will give an extensive answer to a really important question regarding long-term memory.

Using various systems of mnemonic clues, anyone can quickly or almost instantly remember any kind of information. For example, dozens of foreign words, names and faces, abstract pages. At the same time, in order for information to be stored in memory for a long time, it must be repeated.

There are a lot of studies and various kinds of hypotheses and conclusions about how long and how often you need to repeat the material after memorizing it. Here I will give only one repetition mechanism, tested on myself and whose work is surprisingly accurate.

1 secret. Any information must be repeated intensively in the next 96 hours after memorization.

This means that you should not part with the memorized material for another 3-4 days after memorizing it. For example, in the evening you memorized the necessary information from the biography of three great Russian writers using mnemonics. Within 3-4 days, starting from the next, you must repeat this information for a long-term fixation in your memory.

To repeat intensively means a lot in a short period of time. On each of these days, also do 3-4 short approaches to information.

2 secret. It is necessary to repeat actively, that is, without peeping into the material.

Review previously learned material from memory. Try to remember the visuals and other mnemonic cues you used to memorize. Remembering the images, say the information out loud and compare with the original. If the images are not remembered, do not suffer. Just take another look at the material and rearrange the associations. For example, the image you designed disappeared from your memory pen who keeps f.m. Dostoevsky in his most famous portrait. Thus, you forgot that this portrait was painted by Vasily Perov. In this case, re-imagine the pen in the hands of a great writer, but now let it be larger.

3 secret. Each next repetition should be faster than the previous one.

Each time you repeat the material, pay attention to how quickly and easily you do it.

For example, on the morning of the first day, to reproduce from memory the biography of A.S. Pushkin took 10 minutes, and during the afternoon snack of the same day - a little more. This means that the next repetition was slower, which contradicts the third secret. There is only one way out, henceforth do not take such a long break, give the “sun of Russian poetry” a little time during your lunch break.

It should be noted that following this secret, the visual images formed during memorization will dissolve on the fourth day of active repetition. Now you will remember the information without them.

So, you have learned about three secrets of long-term memory that are open to work for you. Try them out and experience instant results. It's fair to say that people are intimidated by 3-4 day repetitions. They immediately remember the unbearable school cramming. I hasten to please you, this is not at all the case. According to the third secret, each new repetition will take you less and less time, and soon the information will be reproduced completely automatically. It's like she's been in your memory all your life.

HOW MANY TIMES TO REPEAT OR WHY CHILDREN DON'T HEAR US

“You have to repeat it a hundred times,” “you hit the wall with peas,” “you won’t do it until you shout” - these phrases confidently occupy the first lines in the hit parade of parental complaints to a child psychologist. Why? The biggest mistake parents make is that they try to give instructions to the crumbs, like little adults. But the "small country" has its own laws of perception, which must be taken into account if we want to be heard.
ERROR 1.
LACK OF EYE CONTACT
Toddlers have only flexible single-channel attention. This means that the child's brain is only able to focus on one task (such as building a tunnel of chairs). It is pointless to be annoyed that the kid who is carried away by the game “does not hear” you - he is simply not capable of it yet. Moreover, mother's words come from somewhere above, while the "real" life passes here, under the chairs!
Work on bugs. Before giving instructions, you need to switch the attention of the little one to yourself. Squat down, look the child in the eyes (you can touch or take the hand). Address him by name: “Dasha, look at me”, “Tyoma, listen to what I say”, etc. It is useful to ask a kid over 3.5 to repeat what he heard. Tasks that you give yourself are much more pleasant to complete.
ERROR 2.
A REQUEST CONSISTING OF SEVERAL
“Take off your boots, wash your hands and go to the table”, - in our opinion, the request is as simple as two and two. But for a child under 3.5–4 years old, this is a rather complicated algorithm. Try to memorize the sequence without missing anything! Here is the baby and "gets stuck" in the hallway.
Work on bugs. Break a complex task into simple ones. Give your child only one short task, for example: "Take off your boots." Move on to the next one when step 1 is completed.
ERROR 3.
"INDIRECT" INSTRUCTIONS
For example: “Are you going to sit in the mud for a long time?”, “Do you like to walk with sticky hands?”. “Kids understand everything literally,” says the psychologist. “It’s still difficult for them to guess that the mother’s question contains a guide to action.”
Work on bugs. It is worth remembering that the child is still learning his native language. Therefore, all requests should sound so that they can be understood unambiguously.
ERROR 4.
Verbosity.
“Sasha, how many times can I tell you not to jump from the chair to the sofa! Have you already forgotten how you bloodied your nose, do you want to fall down again? .. etc. “It is clear that the parent who gives out “speech”, as they say, is “boiled” and he wants to somehow stop the dangerous behavior of the child, says the psychologist. “But listening to a long notation, the child only gets confused in words and forgets what, in fact, it is about.”
Work on bugs. Do not remind the child of "past" sins. You don't have to worry about future troubles. The kid lives "here and now", so trying to influence him with long explanations is pointless. It is best to say briefly at such a moment: “You can’t jump from a chair, it’s dangerous.” After that, you can turn the situation into a joke - for example, remove the naughty from the chair and circle around, play airplanes. Or switch attention - for example, offer to compete who is better to jump over sheets of paper spread out on the carpet. In a word, find a safer outlet for the energy that overwhelms the baby. And the most important rule - if you can not change the child's behavior, change the circumstances that provoke dangerous behavior. For example, move the chair to another room.
ERROR 5.
SCREAM
The child will ask for forgiveness, say that he heard and understood everything. In fact, he did not hear - it was not before that. The main goal was to prevent punishment. In addition, the cry causes anxiety, fear. And fear reduces the ability to think. “Remember how you yourself feel if someone significant, for example, your boss, is talking to you in a raised voice,” the psychologist advises. - Surely there is a feeling that you are lost, as if you are “stupid”? The same thing happens with the child."
Work on bugs. The best way to keep emotions under control is to be consistent. If the child understands that there is no way to beg for an hour of sitting in front of the TV, he will stop ignoring the request to turn off the cartoons.

ERROR 6.
EXPECTING AN IMMEDIATE CHANGE IN BEHAVIOR
American educator Mary Budd Row discovered during experiments that children perceive what was said not as quickly as adults, but with a delay of several seconds. Including because voluntary attention (that is, the ability to force the will to be distracted from the interesting in favor of the necessary) is fully formed in the baby only by the age of 6-7 years. This means that a child under six simply cannot quickly switch from what is interesting to him (for example, to carry stools on the floor) to what is “interesting” to you (get dressed and go to the clinic).
Work on bugs. Give your baby a "temporary" supply. For example, it’s time for you to go home, and the child can’t tear himself away from the game. Agree with him how many times he will be able to slide down the hill before leaving home, then your request will surely be heard. Option: if the little one “doesn’t hear” that it’s time to leave the cars and go to dinner, invite the cars to compete - who will get to the kitchen faster, etc.
ERROR 7.
BREAKED RECORD METHOD
Bad for the child, because he does not get used to independence. “Mom didn’t remind me this time that you need to wash your hands after using the toilet, which means you don’t have to wash them.” Bad for mom, because even the most patient person, forced to constantly be a “record”, is exhausted and one day, because of a trifle, breaks into a baby - scream or spank.
Work on bugs. “Children have a very developed visual memory,” says Oksana Lysikova, “that's why reminder pictures work very effectively for mastering regime moments. For example, at the age of one and a half to two years, the baby is already able to learn that you need to wash your hands in three cases: before eating, after “going” to the potty and after a walk. Hang bright pictures in the bathroom and in the hallway dedicated to these three situations. The child will be happy to mark each washing of hands with a bright circle or a cross.

ERROR 8.
REQUEST - "DENAY"
“Don’t get into a puddle!”, “Don’t slam the door!” Children's perception "skips" the particle "not", and the baby now and then perceives the parental prohibition as a tempting offer.
Work on bugs. Suggest an interesting alternative. For example: "Let's try to get around the puddle along this narrow curb" or "Can you close the door so that no one hears?"
ERROR 9.
PERMANENT PULLING
“As a rule, now and then the child is pulled back by anxious mothers who experience constant fear for the baby and cope with this fear with the help of overprotection,” the psychologist believes. “Don’t step into the mud”, “Caution, the threshold”, “Stop, there is a dog” - and so on all day.” At some point, a child tired of pressure begins to perceive his mother’s speech simply as a “background”.
Work on bugs. Try to count how many times per hour (for example, for a walk) you make comments to your child. Which of these remarks could well not be made? Do not pull him for any reason, but try to be there when the baby is active. Climb up the hill with him, go with the company to see what lies in the bushes, look at the dog together. The baby will definitely “copy” your safe behavior.
ERROR 10.
INABILITY TO HEAR THE CHILD
“It happens that mother and child spend the whole day together, but it’s hard to say that they were together for a long time,” says Oksana Lysikova. - For example, a kid wants to tell his mother something, from his point of view, very important about a pebble found in the sandbox. But mom is carried away by a conversation with a friend: “Wait!” Or on the way to the store, the little one tells something with enthusiasm, the mother nods her head absently, immersed in her thoughts.
Work on bugs. The child learns everything from us, including the art of communication. “It’s not so important how much time you spend with your baby, it’s more important how you spend it,” says the psychologist. - Try to completely immerse yourself in the game for an hour or two, focusing only on communicating with the baby. He will surely “get enough” of attention and want to play on his own, leaving you time to talk with a friend and to think. But a child with whom they spend the whole day “nearby, but not together” gets used to “begging” for attention with the help of pranks.
LEARNED YOURSELF - TEACH ANOTHER!
How to point out mistakes to a child without turning into a “saw”? You can delegate the powers of the "senior" to him. The first stage of learning something - for example, the ability to cross the road correctly or use a fork - should go through the baby's "doublers" - his favorite toys. Your task, with the help of the child, is to give detailed instructions to the toys: “Are you piercing pieces of cutlets? Lower the fork with the tines down. And to bring the puree to your mouth, turn the fork upside down.

 


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