To live in a modern metropolis, citizens have to work every day, earning financial resources for a full existence. In the current situation, most people spend an impressive amount of time in the office. We leave the apartment early in the morning and return to it after sunset. It is not surprising that work becomes a second home for us, in which people with different characters are forced to coexist in harmony. Rarely do all team members easily find a common “language” with each other, avoiding quarrels on professional grounds. Often in the newly-minted "families" there are conflicts caused by the inconsistency of the inner worlds of employees. Working in a stressful environment where negative emotions are in the air is an inappropriate decision that jeopardizes the profitability and productivity of the enterprise.

It makes no sense to endure insults from colleagues, hoping for an end to regular ridicule, because the “offenders” will not stop, feeling their impunity

Biting jokes or caustic ridicule, obscene statements or regular attacks, reports to superiors or constant - the variety of "tests" that employees have to face at work. Colleagues who, in their opinion, choose the most vulnerable person in the team, have fun and amuse themselves, insulting the honor and personal dignity of the employee. It is not surprising that the mental state of the employee is disturbed. Experiencing discomfort, a person does not want to return to work, driven by the instinct of self-preservation. Not every person is able to repulse the "offenders", some people prefer to ignore the ridicule of colleagues without defending. However, to endure the attacks of ill-wishers is an irrational decision that amuses the ego of a boorish team. You need to take care of yourself in time by finding the answer to the following question: What to do if you are insulted at work?

If you have become the object of ridicule from colleagues, then the first thing you need to do is to collect your own thoughts and stop panicking. It is impossible to give offenders pleasure from the current situation, therefore it is important to pull yourself together, in a calm atmosphere, considering further options for the development of events. It is worth noting that there is no difference in the positions of opponents - neither managers nor subordinates have the right to insult you. By adhering to the following recommendations of professional psychologists, you can correctly correct your behavior and or a colleague who wants to laugh at your sense of dignity:

Try not to show your own emotions so as not to satisfy the ego of the author of a caustic joke. You can overwhelm him with a non-standard reaction to the words spoken - laugh with the rest, start a conversation on a distant topic, or loudly refute the authenticity of the words spoken.
Respond to a taunt with a counter-taunt that does not affect your opponent's self-respect. If a colleague in front of the whole team joked about the smell of your perfume, then note their value: “In Italy, prisoners are tortured with the help of my perfume. Do you want to try?". The arrogance of the culprit will disappear, and the team will support you.
If you do not want to get involved in a verbal skirmish with a newly appeared offender who has chosen you as a target, publicly inform your colleagues about this. Why respond to a person whose jokes were relevant in kindergarten? Entering into a dialogue with the kids from the nursery group is not your level, let your colleagues know about it.
If acting is not alien to you, then the role of a deaf and curious person is an effective way to compromise the offender. With a puzzled face, ask again the content of the caustic joke, repeating the procedure until the culprit gets tired of fulfilling your requests. Refer to the opponent's diction or lack of humor in the statements so that the newly appeared "enemy" loses self-confidence.
Object to the offender, compromising with a counter joke or a caustic answer. Your unwillingness to put up with the current state of affairs is a powerful argument for colleagues, demonstrating a sense of your dignity. The next time, the team members will choose a weaker personality for ridicule, leaving you alone.

Following the simple advice of psychologists, you can change the current state of affairs. Colleagues will begin to respect you, no longer releasing sharp jokes and caustic ridicule. If you demonstrate self-esteem to people around you, then the team will definitely appreciate such an act. You can not bend under the opinion of the public, closing your eyes to – this is an irrational decision that leads to the appearance of uncomfortable sensations in a person. If you do not set a goal by adjusting your behavior, then after a short period of time only a psychotherapist can help you.

If you do not know colleagues, you can seek the help of professional lawyers. The legislation of the Russian Federation clearly spells out the duties and rights of every citizen, violating which is strictly prohibited. Insults and humiliation of a person's honor are a clear deviation from the constitutional order of the country. Surrounding people do not have the right to "undermine" the social security of the employee with their sharp jokes or inappropriate swearing, belittling self-esteem. In order to punish the perpetrators in accordance with the law, it is necessary to thoroughly study the corpus delicti, enlisting the advice of a lawyer. The statements of colleagues are considered insults that humiliate your honor if they are accompanied by the following aspects:

the phrase of the offenders contains obscene language;
colleague's joke, involves comparing you with inanimate products, representatives of the animal world, etc .;
a word or phrase that offends self-esteem and belittles honor;
touching the torso or face, bearing a cynical and offensive character;
uncomplicated gestures or facial expressions that deprive you of;
the abuser forces you to take actions;

It is impossible to tolerate and turn a blind eye to the daily behavior of colleagues who violate constitutional rights. If you provide the court with an evidence base testifying to the guilt of employees, then the offenders will definitely answer for their deeds and words spoken. Law enforcement agencies will be guided at the time of the verdict by the Criminal and Civil Codes, in which such violations are prescribed in articles 5.61 of the Code of Administrative Offenses and 152, respectively. The main thing is not to put up with the barbs of colleagues, but in a timely manner to contact the police with a statement about the violation of your constitutional rights or to the world court at the place of residence of the offenders.

It is worth remembering that the offender can offend the “victim” in oral, written and tactile form, belittling the honor and self-esteem of the opponent

In court, you can get moral compensation and achieve justice by putting your boss or colleagues in their place. According to the laws in the Criminal Code and the Civil Code of the Russian Federation, for verbal abuse, the perpetrator must pay a fine of 1,000 to 50,000 rubles or be imprisoned for 15 days; for swearing accompanied by assault - to reimburse compensation (up to 50,000 rubles) and be arrested for a period of 1 year; for a crime in which the victim committed suicide, go to prison for a period of 3 to 7 years.

Turning to the world court, it is important to clearly understand the seriousness of the ongoing processes, because the perpetrators will be punished in accordance with the Criminal Code and the Civil Code of the Russian Federation. If the prosecutor sees the corpus delicti and finds a sufficient amount of evidence, then colleagues may not limit themselves to paying moral compensation. In cases involving mental and physical impact on the victim, imprisonment becomes part of the sentence. It is not surprising that the authorities regularly arrange trainings for the team, keeping, because one inappropriate joke can change the lives of several people at once.

How to properly respond to insults? There is no one in the world who has never been offended.

However, some look optimistic and satisfied with life, while others react painfully to other people's attacks and clog "in a mink".

Let's think about how to properly respond to insults and remain unconvinced?

Big bosses, school teachers, kindergarten teachers, employees of registry offices and housing departments, even ordinary janitors - all the time they strive to offend the innocent.

It is important to distinguish criticism (albeit in a rude form) from insults. A criticizing person will definitely name the facts, his claims are due to specific things and actions.

But the offender often becomes personal, descends to swearing, calling names, but this has nothing to do with your mistakes.

What to do if your boss insults you

In my life there were two opposite working collectives. Pleasant people gathered at the planning meetings of the first one, discussed successes, calmly expressed criticism, and supported those who did not succeed.

After the speech of the talented and calm leader, everyone was full of enthusiasm and set to work with redoubled energy.

At meetings of the second job, the boss constantly shouted, he considered everyone mediocrity and fools.

He could humiliate a young girl for an immodest outfit, a chubby secretary for being overweight, and torture a colleague for half an hour for a crumpled tie.

Exhausted and tired, everyone took up work with reluctance, once a month someone was sure to quit “on their own”.

The easiest way to say “run from this job”, because nothing will change the boss. But not everyone can change lucrative positions like gloves.

However, if you correctly respond to insults, you will soon be able to earn his respect and stay in the team for a long time.

What is needed for that? calm tone, self-confidence, increased self-esteem, smile, self-esteem and understanding of the causes of other people's behavior.

The shorter your answers will be,all the better.

Do not get angry in response, put on a friendly face and forgive the offender in advance. After all, he is weak and primitive, and you are stronger, higher than him.

1. Get away from the situation. Work is not life, it's just work. You get money - not for nerves and complaisance, but for your skills, period.

But no one pays for your peace of mind, so take care of it. Limit contacts with unpleasant people. And after work, friends, children, wife, pets, a delicious dinner, your favorite series are waiting for you.

2. Turn on "ignore". Keep quiet and go about your business until the boss returns to a calm tone.

3. If the offender is inflamed in earnest, you can, hiding malice, thank him for his kind remarks.

He tells you: “Yes, you are probably crazy!”, You boomerang to him: “Oh, you noticed it very well.”

He: “Yes, I have never seen you more stupid,” and you: “Thank you, I appreciate all your comments. I will definitely work on myself." Smile sincerely, well, almost.

4. Consider the scale of the disaster. Is it so scary that a colleague in the heat of a dispute called you an ugly name? There is a war somewhere in the world, someone is always starving, stars explode, new planets are formed ...

On the scale of the universe, the words of some bungler are empty, zero. Should I respond to insults and worry?

5.The method of "aquarium fish" helped many of my colleagues. It is enough to imagine that the boss is talking and talking, and only bubbles come out of his mouth and only gurgling is heard.

Separate yourself mentally from it with aquarium glass and enjoy the view.

6. When they shout at you for no reason (in other words, when it is not necessary to delve into the meaning of words), strain your imagination and Imagine boss, say, giant hamster. Or a harmful monkey that escaped from the enclosure and steals bags from passers-by.

7. Draw air into your lungs and in one breath, exhaling evenly, say: "I would like you to be more polite to me."

Or " Let's get to the point: what specific claims do you have against me? It puts some people in their place, like an ice cold shower.

One of my university teachers managed to overwhelm the smartest students: instead of talking on tickets, she poured personal insults in a low, sarcastic voice. Yes, yes, there are such luminaries of science.

But my not the most gifted (but calm as a tank) classmate managed to pass everything on the first try. During the exam, he also quietly told her, “You are being unprofessional. Let's get back to the subject, shall we?"

8. It is very important to remind presumptuous bosses that slavery and serf labor have long been abolished.

If you are insulted, and you hear cries of “I demand”, “I order” and the like, try changing the tone of the conversation with a calm phrase: “So what kind of request?”, focusing on the last word.

9. The most important thing – don't show resentment, do not succumb to provocation.

Do not break into response reproaches and shouting, do not move your eyebrows angrily, and in general, do not give the offender a reason to see that you are hurt. And only then will you win.

If the scream is compressed into a lump in your throat, go to the toilet, turn on the taps and scream. And then wash your face, smile in the mirror, take a deep breath - and back again.

10. A few more magical phrases that put a person in his place:“Why are you trying to offend me?”, “Are you having an unpleasant day today? I understand, it happens”, “You seemed to me a different, more pleasant person”, “I didn’t expect this from you”, “Excuse me, are you finished? I would like to work."

11. Control your thoughts. Do not remember offensive words at night, do not invent theoretical answers, do not wish for revenge.

All this exhausts you, spoils your mood, but does not affect the offender in any way.

The most “vindictive” thing you can do is to live peacefully and enjoy the new day in spite of everything.

Such situations occur suddenly and sometimes there is no way to prepare answers in advance. This collection of tips and answer options will help you in an emergency to correctly navigate and fight back.

Situations are different and before you start answering you should evaluate it from the outside. This skill is difficult to develop, especially if the stressful situation arose unexpectedly and your first reaction, of course, is to respond to the offender in the same way. But still, before you do this, think about the following:

1. It happens that you yourself could serve as the beginning of this situation, even if you didn’t want to do it at all. Perhaps you touched a personal person and his words are just a reaction to your behavior.
2. When you are absolutely not to blame for a person’s behavior, and the reason for it may simply be that he is in a bad mood and he decided to recoup you, of course, it is simply necessary to fight back.
3. If at the moment the interlocutor is in an abnormal state, he is drunk or does not understand what he is doing, then the best way out of this situation is to get away from him as soon as possible and not try to answer.

4. There are times when the abuser is your boss. Such situations are, of course, very unpleasant, but unfortunately, no matter how much one wants, there is simply no way to answer him the way you want.
5. It is also better not to get into quarrels with colleagues, because this can only aggravate the situation. In this situation, it is advisable to simply leave.

How to respond to an insult

If you are offended by a well-known person who, simply due to circumstances, is now irritated, then in this situation you can act wiser and remain silent.

But there are situations when you are offended by a person who simply finds fault with every little thing and is looking for a reason to start a scandal in everything. In this case, it is worth answering the offender.

1. At the moment when a person insults you, his main goal is to provoke a response from you. For your part, you can discourage and disarm him by remaining absolutely calm and simply agreeing with his words. And after that, thank him for taking the time to look for your shortcomings and point them out to you. He definitely does not expect such behavior from you and he will understand that it is simply useless to continue doing this.
2. The method can also help to get out of the situation with dignity when you answer the interlocutor with the same phrases, for example: “So what?”; "So what?" etc. Such a reaction of yours will allow you to remain calm and will infuriate your interlocutor.
3. An unexpected reaction to his words on your part will also help to disarm the interlocutor. For example, if you take and laugh at the moment when he insults you.

In any case, try at such moments to learn how to behave competently and not get involved in mutual insults. Try not to let your opponent get what he is trying to achieve by creating this situation. Of course, it’s not easy to pull yourself together, but this is what will help you get out of the situation as a winner.

How funny to respond to an insult, example

• Do you like playing in public? Not Enough PR Opportunities?
• Thank you of course for moralizing, but it is better to help me with money.
• Are you missing hugs? Do you want me to hug you?
• You talk so interestingly, but say something clever better.
• Of course, I heard that nature has a wonderful sense of humor, but looking at you, I was also convinced of this.
• I certainly appreciate your advice. But why judge everyone by themselves?
• Have you ever thought about saving nature? I can suggest a surgeon and arrange for him to sterilize you.
• You look so stupid now that I'm not even offended at all. Rather, even funny.
• Oh, I always dreamed of meeting Shrek live! Finally my dream came true!
• It's so funny to me that I can't even adequately answer you. Have you thought about a career as a comedian?

How to respond to an insult with sarcasm

• I read somewhere that insulting other people hides their complexes. Don't you think it's really true?
• Of course, I would listen to you more, but somehow you are boring.
• You think so primitively that you don't even want to answer.
• If suddenly I want to know your opinion, I will ask you.
• You go on, go on. Maybe you can come up with something smarter?
• Is your imagination limited or is your vocabulary exhausted?
• What an amazing talent you have! You don't even have to pretend to be stupid!
• Perhaps your parents were happy when you moved out of them?
• Your behavior makes me very sad. I thought you were smarter.
• If you want to appear smarter, shut up.

How to respond to an insult witty

• After your birth, nature must have realized its mistake.
• How well you manage to remain stupid no matter what!
• It looks like you just lost your dignity. Help you find him?
• And where did you get so smart? You probably graduated from a madhouse with a red diploma?
• It's a shame they don't die of stupidity. Then you wouldn't be around.
• Yes, of course I can go to a psychiatric hospital. But are strangers allowed into your house?
• Looks like it's time for you to hurry. As far as I know, the psychiatric hospital closes early.
• You are so much like the ocean. You make me sick just the same.
• Now that's self-confidence! Do you consider yourself completely invulnerable?
• Your brains are only enough to turn a cigarette into ashes.

How to respond to an insult with smart words

• Your primitive phrases depress me. Could you be smarter?
• Do you want to hear from me a polite answer, or a truthful one?
• Sounds like you need to rethink your diet. Carcinogens accumulated from junk food began to destroy your brain.
• Do not try to hurt my dignity by using your shortcomings.
• Well, nothing, you just have to be patient a little. After all, they have already learned to increase their lips and breasts. Surely soon learn and increase brains.
• I'd love to talk to you, but I need to lie down to be on the same level as you.
• What a pity that you know how to assert yourself only with the help of insults.
• You are a living confirmation of the phrase that if there is no mind, then it begins to sink even lower with the help of insults.
• Apchi! I think I'm allergic to your stupidity!
• I don't associate with people who try to cover up their low IQ with insults.

How to respond to a person with rude words

• You do know that restoring teeth is very expensive these days, don't you? I wouldn't risk it like that if I were you!
• Go sterilize! People like you just can't reproduce!
• You should not climb under a hot hand, otherwise you can run into a hot foot!
• I would like to offend you now, but judging by you, nature has already done it for me.
• Run up and kiss me while I'm standing behind a tree.
• Instead of this tirade, better decorate our world with your absence from it!
• I would very much like to send you, but judging by the appearance you just got back from there!
• Opposite my house there is a cemetery, and you apparently really want to become my neighbor.
• You would be of great benefit to the world if you hung yourself in the corner.
• What a pity that one thought cannot kill. Otherwise, you would already be dead.

How to respond gracefully to an insult

• Don't worry like that! I don't have the pleasure of seeing you!
• Unfortunately, you cannot save the world with beauty and intelligence!
• Look, do you see this plinth? Here he is on the same level with you, insult him!
• Please restrict me from communicating with you.
• How interesting to watch you, otherwise I have not been to the circus for so long!
• Let's agree that you won't tell lies about me. For this, I will not tell anyone the truth about you!
• Of course, you are not smart. But I didn't even think it was that much.
• To communicate with people like you is not in my competence. Therefore, talk better to the nightstand.
• I would like to explain where you are wrong. But your little brain will not be able to withstand such a flow of information.
• Unfortunately, all that you have is positive - it's only the Rh factor.

How to adequately respond to an insult

• Are you trying to convince yourself now?
• I will not even try to think about the set of words that you are now pronouncing!
• From your lips, these words sound like compliments.
• If you don't like me that much, then no one forbids you to cry about it in the corner.
• It is very foolish of you to hide your own failure behind rudeness.
• Your words do not offend me at all, it would be more insulting to hear them from an intelligent person!
• Aren't you afraid that fate will one day answer you the same?
• I have absolutely no desire to associate with primitive man!
• Spreading such words, do not forget that fate makes us one day pay for all our actions!
• Unfortunately, I thought much better of you.

How to respond to an insult with humor

• Don't be so angry! And then the pimples will start to burst!
• I don't even need to scare you! For me, this mirror does every day!
• Stop croaking, otherwise you will suddenly swallow your tongue!
• You are like a slime, just as vile and nasty.
• I thought clowns were only found in the circus!
• For people like you, Mario players jump from above!
• Are you the main actor in the movie Dumb and Dumber?
• Looks like a monkey escaped from the zoo. Stay here, the zoologists will come for you.
• How hard it must be to live with such a small intellect. Well, at least try to make the bone marrow work.
• Looks like you got bitten by a bee on your tongue. I can't find any other explanation for your terrible smell from your mouth.

How to respond to a boor for an insult

• I thought you were only not beautiful on the outside, but you were also rotten on the inside.
• I am well aware that you are entitled to your own opinion. But this right does not oblige me to listen to him.
• I'm so interested in what you're talking about that I even wanted to sleep.
• Well, try to think at least using the bone marrow!
• How fearless you are, just throwing words like that. Aren't you afraid that you will have to answer later?
• I would like to hit you, but I'm afraid that the animal rights activists will accuse me of mistreating animals.
• When you start talking, I look so smart against your background! Go on!
• It must be very difficult for you to live. Don't want to talk about it?
• Go make a fuss to the landfill, to the society of people like you!
• Save our world from your presence!

How insulting to respond to an insult

• Your words fully reflect your level of intelligence!
• If I wanted to hear the barking of dogs, I would get myself a mongrel.
• If the appearance is terrible, it does not give the right to behave the same way!
• Probably, when the stork brought you, mother wanted to take a better stork for herself.
• Did you just come up with all this now or did you rehearse for a week?
• It seems your pot hasn't been cooking for a long time.
• Your mental development completely coincides with the level of the shell.
• In your case, there is only one good trait. The one that separates the buttocks.
• It seems that at the time of the disaster you did not have time to escape from Chernobyl in time.
• It seems that in your body the absence of a head is replaced by the fifth point.

How to respond to an insult to a man

• They say when the dignity is too small, they try to cover it with another part of the body. In your case - a long language.
• Is it hard for you to find a mate? Because as soon as the mongrels agree to live with you.
• Your dignity has just sunk to the bottom.
• I don't even want to look at you.
• You can only drag the family down.
• I do not want to know even such a low entity as you.
• Unfortunately, you don't even realize how low you've fallen. But the people around see it.
• Probably your woman is very ashamed of her choice.
• Judging by your words, you are just a moral impotent.
• You hide a small dignity with a sharp tongue.

How to boldly respond to an insult

• Alas, you are not distinguished by a rich imagination.
• You can't even get any dumber.
• You probably think that I'm really interested in your opinion.
• Yes, you should definitely not expect the best from you.
• Apparently when you were created, God ran out of materials and had to use the leftovers.
• Go wash off all your idiocy.
• You don't seem to think at all.
• You can't really prove that you have a mind.
• You just have an endless stream of stupidity, maybe splashing it out will at least find the remnants of the mind.
• Looking at you, I want to go back in time and persuade your parents to have an abortion.

How to rudely respond to an insult

• In your case, it is better to open your mouth only at the dentist.
• Let's play hide and seek. You will hide away from me, but I will not look.
• But until I opened my mouth, it seemed to me that a decent person was standing in front of me!
• Don't scare the crows with your appearance!
• Communicating with you means sinking to the same level, and I'm not interested!
• Run back to your madhouse before I call the orderlies!
• Go graze with other cows, don't blather!
• Save this world by crashing against the wall with a running start.
• It must be hard to live being a mistake of nature.
• Shut up, maybe you can even look smarter!

How cool to respond to an insult

• Even arguing with you is pointless. Your brain just can't take it.
• It will be difficult for me to offend a person on whom nature has already recouped itself.
• You go on, go on. Maybe you can come up with something interesting.
• A woman who is older and reproaches her age can be answered: “We are the same age. I just know how to take care of myself and maintain beauty.
• Unfortunately, your mental development causes me only boredom.
• Why are you leaving so slowly?
• Congratulations! It seems you just managed to cross the threshold of all human stupidity.
• You are trying to answer questions that I did not ask.
• You are a unique specimen! You are the embodiment of a complete misunderstanding!
• Unfortunately, you do not differ in the ability to maintain a conversation.

How to respond harshly to an insult

• Well, at least you're lucky with your looks. It fully reflects your ugly inner world!
• Such a smelly creature only communicates with flies.
• What a fine fellow you are, let me shake your throat!
• Before insulting me, say goodbye to your family.
• It's time for you to decide what gender you are.
• Do you feel bad or do you always look like this?
• Even the horoscope laughs at you.
• It would be better if your parents planted a tree, although maybe that's what they did!
• Here is a paradox: your head is big, but there is no brain in it.
• It looks like your parents dropped you in brake fluid as a child.

How to answer a woman to an insult

• Alas, but your dignity ended 7 more men ago.
• To mess with someone like you, only to dishonor yourself.
• You have such behavior as if you were raised in a brothel.
• Your mouth stinks worse than we do.
• Men can only look at you with pity.
• Outwardly, you fully reflect your inner world.
• Of course, I understand that you are beautiful, but it is much more interesting to communicate with smart people.
• You not only squandered your beauty on men, but also lost the remnants of your mind.
• If nature has cheated on appearance, then it will not work to hide it with a sharp tongue.
• Inflated lips and chest are not yet proof of intelligence and beauty.

Ecology of life. Psychology: Defending yourself against insults, it's easy to get caught up in a vicious circle of punches and counter-punches. However, there are ways...

Offensive words lie in wait for us daily - often when we are least ready for it:

• on the road during rush hours, when people show their worst qualities;
• in lines when we run out of patience;
• at work and at the festive table, where people consider rudeness almost permissible.

Critical attacks are so varied that they defy classification. Here are “light”, everyday injections (“well, finally!”), And such when it gets dark in the eyes from resentment (“I see that you are busy doing what you do best - you are eating again”).

Sometimes words just betray insensitivity. Gathering his courage, the son told his mother that his wife had left him, and in response he heard: “She was going for a long time.”

It is believed that in the family we can hide from the world. In fact, relatives say things to each other that they would never say to an outsider, often adding in justification: “You know, I say this because I love you.”

One woman recalls how one day, when she was 12 years old, she was standing in front of a mirror and her mother suddenly said: “Don't worry, dear. If the nose still grows, it will be possible to do the operation.” Until that day, the girl had no idea that she did not have a perfect nose.

Particularly "good" are the veiled insults, which are called "constructive criticism", although they have nothing to do with it. They are easily recognizable by their accompanying phrases such as "I hope I can speak frankly with you" or "I'm telling you this for your own good". It turns out that you should almost admire the sincerity of the critic and appreciate his concern, while you are hardly recovering from the blow.

When defending against insults, it's easy to get caught up in a vicious circle of punches and counterstrikes. Fortunately, there are ways to repel the attack of the offender without dropping your own dignity.

The next time you're the target of criticism, try these tips.

1. Try to understand

The one who criticizes others is often filled with resentment himself. If you can't figure out what the person who offended you is really worried about, ask them about it. Remember: resentment is not always meant for you personally. Look at the situation from the outside and look for the cause.

The waitress is rude to you not because she didn’t like you for some reason - just the day before her beloved left her. The driver, "cutting" you, does not want to annoy you - he is in a hurry to the sick child. Pass it forward, support it.

Trying to understand those whose words hurt you, you can more easily endure the offense.

2. Analyze what was said

In her book The Subtle Art of Verbal Self-Defence, Suzette Hayden Elgin suggests decompose the offending remark into parts and respond to the unspoken reproach without making yourself a victim. For example, if you hear “if you loved me, you would lose weight,” you can answer like this: “And how long ago did you decide that I don’t love you?”

3. Turn to face the offender

It is not easy to resist insults. Helps, in particular, directness. Remove the negative charge, for example, with such a question: “Do you need to offend me for some reason?” or “Do you understand how such words can be perceived?”

You can also ask the person to clarify the meaning of the remark: “What do you mean?” or “I want to check if I understood you correctly?” As soon as your critic feels that his game has been figured out, he will leave you alone. After all, when you were caught red-handed, it's very embarrassing.

4. Use humor

My friend somehow had to hear: “Is this your new skirt? In my opinion, chairs are upholstered with such fabric. She was not at a loss and answered: "Well, sit down on my knees."

The mother of my friend all her life zealously monitored the cleanliness of the house. One day she found a cobweb in her daughter and asked: “What is this?” "I'm doing a scientific experiment," retorted the daughter. The best weapon against offensive criticism is laughter. A witty response will help you deal with almost any offender.

5. Come up with a symbol

One woman told me that her husband always criticized her in public. Then she began to carry a small towel with her and whenever her husband said something offensive to her, she covered her head with a towel. He was so ashamed that he got rid of his bad habit.

6. Don't mind

Agree with everything. If your wife says, "I think you've put on ten pounds, dear," answer, "Twelve, to be exact." If she doesn’t back down: “Well, what are you going to do with the extra weight?” - try this: “Nothing, probably. I'll just be fat for a while." A hurtful remark is only as powerful as you empower it. By agreeing with criticism, you disarm the critic.

7. Ignore the injection

Listen to the remark, tell yourself that it is in the wrong place, and forget it. The ability to forgive is one of the most important abilities that help us live and that we can develop in ourselves.

If you are not quite ready to forgive yet, let the speaker know that his remark was heard, but there will be no answer. The next time you get taunted, wipe the imaginary stain off your shirt. When the person who hit you asks what you're doing, say, "I thought something hit me, but I must have been wrong."

When the abuser knows that you know too, he becomes much more careful. Or pretend like you're not interested. Blink, yawn, and look away as if to say, “Who cares?” People can't stand being considered boring.

8. Add 10 percent

You will never be able to completely protect yourself from offensive remarks. Try to perceive some of them as natural manifestations of irritation that happen to everyone.

Most of us try not to offend others, but sometimes we make mistakes. So get defensive when you think it's necessary, but think also of the "10 percent rule":

In 10 percent of cases, it turns out that the item you bought is cheaper elsewhere.
- in 10 percent of cases, the thing that you lent to someone is returned to you damaged.
- In 10 percent of cases, even your best friend can say something without thinking and then regret what was said.

In other words, grow thicker skin. It's usually easiest to assume that people are trying to do their best, and many simply don't realize how their behavior affects others.

Constantly defending, proving one's case and controlling the situation is too expensive. Try to forgive and in return you will get much less resentment and trouble than these notorious 10 percent.

Also interesting: Make friends with your fear: IT IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN YOU THINK

When a man insulted the Buddha, he said, "My son, if anyone refuses to accept a gift, to whom does it then belong?" “To the one who gives,” the man replied. “So,” continued the Buddha, “I refuse to accept your insulting words.

The world is full of people who humiliate others in order to assert themselves. Do not accept insults, even when they are showered upon you, as gifts of love. By ignoring them, you will relieve tension, strengthen your relationships with others, and make your life more joyful. published

There are a lot of people in the world who are different from each other. The differences lie in their character, manner of walking, talking, eating, dressing, in the rules of culture, development as a person. All these moments have a very strong influence on a person. It often happens that there are people who have no idea about the culture and rules of communication.

Insults

Most people can often be rude, present the other in a bad light. Such situations can occur with people of different ages, from early childhood to quite mature years. Not all people can insult and be rude. There are those who simply do not know how to act in such situations. What to do if you are offended? This question worries everyone who has been insulted at least once in their life. He makes you think about your actions and actions in relation to other people.

Why are people rude? What are the reasons for their behavior?

In order to understand how to act in such situations, it is important to understand the reasons for the occurrence of such behavior of another person. After all, knowing the reason, you can not take the words of a person seriously. An insult can be immediately answered beautifully and without the development of further conflict. People can be rude and humiliate another person for the following reasons:

1. A person is unhappy and cannot fully enjoy himself. In this situation, he may insult others for the reason that he considers himself unhappy. That is, he has nothing to rejoice in life. At the same time, shouting at another helps him feel happy.
2. There is no reason to be offended. There are people who simply feed on negative energy, and their screams are a common condition that does not allow you to live in a normal way. He wastes his nerves, his emotions, because he has pain inside.
3. By downgrading another person, many people raise their ego. As you know, the ego is a state of mind that helps a person to feel a personality in himself. But this feeling should know the measure. Because otherwise it will simply rise above another person, catching him for petty misconduct. It is important to remember here that everyone has their own shortcomings.

What should you do if you are offended?

What to do if you are offended? In such a situation, it is important to behave as required by behavior and communication norms. It is not always necessary to stoop to the same level and offend him with your words and actions. After all, a weak and insecure person offends. There are a lot of such people in life, it is impossible to get rid of them. Therefore, do not take it seriously and do not pay attention to it.

But what if you have been greatly offended? What to do in such a situation? There are a large number of cases when you can get nasty. A conflict situation may occur, and insults will emerge during it. This is perhaps the most common occurrence in life, and it can happen to just about anyone.

If you are an offender...

It happens that a person did not want to do this. But, alas, it happened in a fit of strong emotions. Then it becomes interesting for many to know how to behave if they offended a person? What to do in such a situation? It's easier here. After all, it’s enough just to stop talking nonsense and just ask for an apology, explaining your impulse that these are just emotions.

School. What to do if peers bully your child in an educational institution?

Insult is always unpleasant words. They may be directed at another person. What to do if you are offended? You can act in such a situation in different ways. Depending on the person who is rude, and on the moment at which the incident occurred.

There are different areas of human life, which will also distinguish cases of conflicts and insults. For example, school. This is a place where children of all ages come to learn. They spend a lot of time in it, gaining knowledge on subjects, and sometimes life experience.

If at school, what should parents and children do? First of all, it is important to remember that if a child is offended, then only parents should monitor and intercede for the child. Each person understands the word "offend" differently. Its essence is also conveyed to children in various ways.

Boys are prone to frequent insults, who at the time of the game can say offensive words, commit some act. Your child does not need to be taught that it is necessary to repeat the same movement and pronounce the same words. After all, it often happens with children that after half an hour they are already playing again. And when adults teach people to respond to bad actions with bad deeds, then these scandals will only grow.

So what do you do if your child is bullied at school? Now let's figure it out. It is important for parents to solve the problems of children from their earliest age, or rather, to help them cope in difficult situations. Children come from different families, with different abilities and behavior. Therefore, it is worth focusing on their education. If often a child begins to hear bad words addressed to him, then he will simply become isolated over time and stop developing as a person, because he will have fear. Unfortunately, this can happen once and for all. Therefore, from a very early age, it is important to teach the child to the possibility of aggression from other people, words of insult.

Parents should clearly separate the words and actions of classmates. If these are just verbal insults, then it is important for the child to be taught how to respond and respond to them correctly. But it also happens that things take a different turn, namely, a child can be hit. In this case, parents are simply obliged to intercede for him.

What to do if your spouse offended you?

Unfortunately, abuse can happen even within the walls of one's own home. This is the feeling that can be caused in the process of a quarrel, a scandal. Most often, such aggressive acts can be between a husband and wife. Spouses often swear and allow themselves to utter bad words.

If the husband offends, what to do in this case? Of course, it is important to understand that if insults come to you, then each person in the pair is to blame. Rarely, a spouse can utter words of humiliation to a soulmate just like that. Most often, this is an incident that provokes the manifestation of such emotions. Adults should calm down, find a compromise in resolving a conflict dispute. There are some varieties of cases when a husband offends seriously, and ordinary conversations in this case are not enough. Here it is worth looking for the cause of the occurrence of this and rather solve the problem.

What to do if you offended a man?

It also happens that a man. What to do in such a situation? It's a little easier here. The reason is that a woman can offend and immediately be able to easily and simply make amends. After all, she is full of charm and attractiveness, which she can use. really simple, especially when you know the weak points and just cling to them. In the modern world, men are no longer those knights on horseback who can stand up for themselves and for the interests of their woman.

Now you know what to do if you are offended. And here it is important to make key points. First of all, you should be smarter than the one who offends. And this means that sometimes you need to remain silent and ignore a person. Of course, one should not always give up and be silent. Because there are situations that do not allow repetition. Then it is worth responding nicely and clearly to the insult.

You need to remember that it is the one who offends who is the loser. Such people should be pitied. After all, they are unhappy in life, they do not have their own happiness and deeds that would simply distract from negative thoughts. You can respond to an insult with the same actions and words. The person will realize that they are wrong and may apologize for their actions. At the moment of insult, it is necessary to turn off emotions. Indeed, sometimes they will simply spoil the whole picture and lead only to a negative result. It is important to perceive yourself as a person, behave like a person and understand that there are the same people around who want to live, enjoy every day, raise children and be happy. But they have their own character and behavior. Therefore, it is important to treat them the same way as they are.

A small conclusion

One has only to imagine for a moment what will happen if every person responds in this way to an insult and tough behavior - this is the end of peace and goodness on earth. Every psychologist claims that it is necessary to change yourself initially. Once the habits of insulting a person are gone, everything will fall into place. Then children will not hear this, and then repeat after adults.